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Rosanne Coury, M.A.E.A., is a Religious Studies teacher. A member of Kappa Delta Pi, she has been recognized in Who’s Who Among American High School Teachers and nominated for the Golden Apple Award.

Days shorten. Cold creeps into my bones.Leaves gently touch my face before landing gracefully on the ground. Autumn slowly sheds its brilliant coat just as Winter peeks around the corner.

Fall has much to teach me about gratitude. She never complains that her season is short. She doesn’t withhold her beauty. She revels in those days between the autumnal equinox and the winter solstice. And she invites me to share her attitude of wanton appreciation of every precious moment, scent and sight.

The word gratitude actually has its roots in the word grace. From English to French to Latin back to ancient Greek the term has its distant beginnings in chairo: to rejoice. As I follow Autumn’s footsteps towards another Thanksgiving holiday, I realize again that gratitude is so much more than simply saying, “Thanks.” It is a way of life grounded in graciousness.

To be gracious is to be appreciative. It means to take joy in what is, rather than bemoan whatever might be lacking. To be gracious is to embrace the moment—and myself in the moment—even when I shiver in anticipation of hardship and possible loss. Instead of layering on defense mechanisms and protective distractions, the gracious person remains open and authentic and grateful. This is not mindless perkiness or superficial happiness. It rises out of a deep conviction that being, however difficult at times, is fundamentally valuable, wonderful and good.

Graciousness is a stance, a way of orienting oneself toward life. Like a graceful dancer, the gracious person moves through life with distinctive poise. It isn’t that there are no sprains, strains or disappointments. But these real pains and hurts pale in the blinding realization that life, and the ability to savor it, is greater and more wonderful by far.

To me the face of grace is a portrait in love. Real love. Not those tawdry imitations we see in commercials, soap operas and sitcoms. To love is to become committed and involved, encountering ourselves, others, nature and life, itself, with a gentle but radical honesty. To see what is, to feel what is, to embrace what is. Therein lies the key to a gracious, appreciative way of life. Real love is not blind at all. It sees, values, forgives and accepts. It appreciates. Real love gives us energy. That special kind of energy results in joy, and the capacity to rejoice. The face of grace.

How often have I seen this in the faces of older relations and friends? Dynamic individuals with arthritic bodies, but sparkling eyes, raisin-complexions, but daring, bubbling smiles. I see them around my Thanksgiving table. When I pay attention, I also see them in the library, the grocery store, the local coffee shop. They know the value of life. They appreciate. They are the faces of grace.

Gratitude, graciousness, appreciation, grace, joy: none of these words are in vogue today. Planned obsolescence. Financial success. New and improved. Quick fixes. High expectations. A fast and demanding pace. Towards what? Certainly not satisfaction. What seems in vogue does not seem to lead to love or to joy.

Yet isn’t that what we crave?

Thanksgiving can be reduced to a single day. As such it is just a 24-hour season sandwiched between an increasingly gruesome Halloween and an array of frenetic year-end holidays. But a day of turkeys, pies, football games and other traditions cannot take the place of a gracious lifestyle, an appreciative stance.

That’s why I find Autumn to be such a powerful teacher. Generous, bright, energizing. Leaves that float gracefully and crunch cheerfully underfoot. Pungent smells of past growth, teasing winds. So many opportunities to revel and rejoice. The face of Autumn is the face of a friend who gives me an annual lesson in appreciation. It isn’t how long the moment lasts. It’s how deeply I savor each moment.

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